Dreams or Nightmares?

I often have weird dreams, and sometimes other people have referred to them as nightmares, but they're not.  Even if I wake up in a sweat, I think of them as dreams because I have them so often.  Nightmares, to me, are the more emotional dreams - where not only has something 'bad' happened, but it happens to someone close to me.  Maybe I've had a huge argument with my husband, or a parent has died, or I've had to take one of my children into hiding, and I'm worrying about the other?  These are nightmares.  Dreams, otoh, I generally wake up and shrug off.

The past few nights, I've not been sleeping well. My husband still has a bad back, and slept on the sofa-bed, because it is more firm than our mattress.  I thought this might give me the opportunity for undisturbed sleep, but no.  Firstly, DD1 came into my room at 2:30am crying because of growing pains.  I suffered with growing pains when I was young, so I fully sympathise.  Then I had 2 very vivid dreams.

For the first one, I have to explain a bit of background, and it may be wise to not be eating if you
have a sensitive stomach.  Not many creepy crawlies scare me.  I don't want them crawling on me, but I can rescue worms in the garden, move a spider outside etc.  Ants, however, I hate.  I know exactly when it started - when I was 11yo I started needing to wear glasses, but could get by (I thought) not needing to wear them all the time.  The world was a bit blurry and fuzzy, but I could live with that.  That summer, on a hot day, I went into my kitchen to cut myself some chocolate cake.  Things were fuzzy as usual, however it wasn't until I was really close that I realised the chocolate cake was not moving because of my bad eyes, but because it was absolutely smothered with ants. Yuck. (Even typing this now, I'm pulling a 'yuck' face!)  So, no. I don't like ants.

It's a couple of hours after I woke up, so I cannot remember the dreams exactly, but I can remember the bits that woke me up.

In the first dream, we were afflicted by a sort of plague - ants crawling all over us and our things. 

The room had a few beds in, and mine was by the window.  I had discovered that if you managed to brush all the ants off your leg, for example, you could apply a cream which would discourage them from returning for a while.  I managed to get to the point where I had no ants on me, or my bed - until someone who was covered with them, came and sat on my bed, and they returned on me.  So I had to start scraping the ants off my legs again, and simultaneously had to convince the others in the room to do the same.  It would only be when the whole room was free of ants, could be we sure that they wouldn't return.

In the second dream, there were two of us who were some kind of time travellers.  We had a mission
to do, and we'd return to the present either through some technological way, or by us both being asleep at the same time, when we'd be teleported to the spot from which we left to go to the past.  So, in my dream, I couldn't find the other person, so decided to come home to he present.  Hours later, I

woke up freezing cold, to discover I was no longer in bed, but had woken up from the teleportation point.  The other person had clearly just fallen asleep, and our automatic return had kicked in.  It turned out that he was being chased, as somebody had found out we were from the future, but that person was also from the future and wanted to stop our mission.  He had forced himself to stay awake and in hiding, to prevent that other person from following and finding out where we lived. We walked back home, and were staying in halls of residence or an old building.  As we got there, a mysterious man with a moustache started cleaning and vacuuming.  That seemed a bit odd, but since it was early morning, I informed him of the rules regarding noise, and unplugged the vacuum.  Moustache Man didn't seem too happy about it, but we left and continued walking to our rooms.  It was then, that my partner remember he had seem Moustache Man before - in the past.  So we tried to walk/run as fast as we could to our rooms, making sure we weren't being followed, and double locked the doors.  We heard Moustache Man approach the door, and he started fiddling with the lock, presumably to pick it from the outside.  We hid ourselves in the apartment as best we could, waiting.
And then I woke up.

Weekly update No3

I lost a kilo!  I said last week, I wanted to lose a kilogram, and I have. Phew!


It hasn't been easy. I haven't managed to up my vegetable intake as much as I wanted, and my weight went up significantly after a night of liquid carbs... ahem!  Not helped by my feeling ill the next day, and only being able to stomach bread, ahem ahem...


I also have not managed to fit in any Body Groove.  On the rare days when I know in advance that I have time (like this morning), something always seems to get in the way.  For example, this past week, my husband is really suffering with back pain.  He's maxed out the painkillers, but keeps waking up in pain.  This in turn wakes me up, causing me to then oversleep.  Which I did, and only woke up just before lunchtime.

I need to reset my body clock. The best way to do that, for me, is to go camping - going to bed in the dark and waking up at dawn is brilliant.  But it's winter, so I don't want to be outside in zero degree weather.  Instead, I'm inside in the warm, with artificial lights on most of the day and night.

Moving on to next week, I would like to lose at least 0.5kg.  Being realistic that I'm not eating or exercising well atm, but still giving myself an achievable goal.
Positive thinking means positive weightloss.

Slow Cooker Bread Recipe

One of the pages I follow on FB is the Bootstrap Cook, and recently she has posted her slow cooker bread recipe.  Again, this is something that I hadn't considered using my slow cooker for, so I thought I would give it a go, to go with the Chicken and Basil Stew I'm making for dinner tonight.

The recipe can be found in full on Jack Monroe's blog so I won't create it here, but it took less than 15min prep, before being in the slow cooker for 1.5hrs, and then a further 40min to cook the underside.  I didn't follow the recipe exactly - I used 360g of flour (because the packet was nearly finished so I chucked the rest in) which probably resulted in a bit more water being used, but I didn't measure it out properly.  I also didn't leave the bread to rest for 20min before putting in the slow cooker -I just put it straight in on top of some mixed seeds, and sprinkled more on the top of the bread too.  (Reading through the recipe, I couldn't work out which side of the bread is going to be the top or not.)  After the suggested time, the bread didn't sound quite hollow (I'm guessing because there was more flour) and it didn't rise as much as expected, so maybe next time I will leave it to rise before I start cooking it.

The bread was really tasty, but a bit dense, so for me and my slow cooker, there's definitely need to let it rise. Not bad for a first try.
I can imagine that if it was cut thinly, then toasted lightly with a smothering of butter - Mmmm, mmmm, mmmm!

Vegan Chocolate Mousse/Hummus Recipe

I saw something on Facebook recently called Chocolate Hummus. I'd never heard of it before, but have made chocolate mousse recipes using chia seeds before.  Despite, not being able to find the recipe I saw again, I decided to have a go and make it up.

I used:

Tin of chickpeas, drained
2 tbsp cocoa powder
1 ripe avocado
3 tbsp maple syrup
1 tbsp sunflower oil

Then, I put them all in a blender and blitzed.
Simples.

Now, if I'm honest, I should have used my big, proper, powerful blender, rather than my hand-blender, as the texture was a bit weird - I'd prefer it to be smoother. 
The taste, however, was really nice. I think some added dates would make it taste a bit more like chocolate fudge, but overall was a good experiment. It made 4 portions, which are now sitting in my fridge, ready for when I next fancy something sweet.  I did lick out the bowl (as you do) and it is quite sweet, so could conceivably be split into 6 or 8 portions.

I used Explore Food Calculator to look at the nutrition of my recipe.  Per portion (a quarter of the mixture) it contains 10g of protein, 7g of sugar, and 9g of fibre. 
Not bad for a sweet treat that took less than 5min to make!

Ovarian Cancer Anniversary

As I've mentioned before, four years ago, my mum was first diagnosed with ovarian cancer.  This is a huge anniversary.  At time of diagnosis, the cancer was already at Stage 4. This means it had already spread beyond the tumour in her ovaries, and was in her lymph nodes in her neck.  At this stage, we were told there is only a 15% chance of surviving 5 years; as such, it's amazing my mum has now survived 4 years. Not least because she's at the end of more chemo treatment*, because it has returned multiple times. her cancer has been reclassified as Chronic Ovarian Cancer, meaning she will never be totally rid of it.  Thankfully, her cancer is very responsive to chemo, so that as long as she's willing to undergo treatment, I don't need to think of the alternative.

http://www.aboutcancer.com/

Now, what's interesting for me, is that I was just trying to find a graphic to go with this post, and eventually found this one from About Cancer.

However, when I looked for a UK source, the only images I could find show a much worse prognosis (~5%) which makes it much more amazing that my mum is still alive.

www.cancerresearchuk.org

Obviously, my mum's diagnosis, and the fact I have the BRCA1 mutation, means that cancer, specifically breast and ovarian, are close to my thoughts.  They symptoms of ovarian cancer can be quite subtle, so please make sure you are aware of them (and if you're male, make sure your friends and relatives are aware.  Incidentally, if you're a male BRCA carrier, you have an increased risk of breast cancer and prostate cancer, and can still pass the mutation to any children).  Any concerns, or in any what where your body doesn't appear or feel or react like it usually does, then go to your GP immediately.  It's not worth the risk.

Some more sites where you can get good information and support:
https://ovarian.org.uk/
https://www.targetovariancancer.org.uk/
https://www.cancerresearchuk.org/
http://www.breastcancergenetics.co.uk/

*My mum informed me this morning, that her latest scan says she's currently cancer free!  She has one session of chemo left this week, to complete her course.  Long may it last!

MosaiCraft

Part of being a Dance Mum, is that you have to go around the country to various dance festivals.  Last year, we were at the North Somerset Dance Festival, and decided to make a holiday of it by staying in a caravan park.  On one of our free days, we visited Clevedon Craft Village, and that is where we came across MosaiCraft.  For a pound, they were allowing children to make up keyrings of their own designs, from small plastic pixels, so both girls had a go.  Whilst there, I was perusing all the different kits that were for sale, and came across Tranquil Lake.  I really liked the colours, and I thought finally, a craft that I can do! So I did.

It's surprisingly easy actually, as long as you can use a pair of tweezers.  Each kit consists of baseplates (this picture has 6 baseplates), sheets of paper with the pattern on, and the pixels.  Unlike cross-stitch, which can be complicated to follow the pattern, this is very easy.  The transparent baseplates sit on top of the pattern, and you fill each colour as if it's a colour-by-numbers.  Each section of the pattern only has four colours on it, and they are in numerical order (this is not colour order, so the designs can look very odd until they are finished), and once completed, you move on to the next section.

After I completed the sunset, which took around a month for me to do, I decided that my mum, who does cross-stitch herself, would really appreciate something like this.  

I contacted MosaiCraft about their Bespoke Service, and set off a photograph from my mum's wedding.  They came back to me with various options, and I chose the one I wanted.  It was 24 baseplates, and took me 3.5months to complete.  Considering I only did this whilst I was waiting for the girls' activities (either dancing or home ed), and there was a summer break in between, I don't think it took too long at all.  And, the benefit of this hobby was that I was able to appear sociable and keep up a conversation at the same time, as opposed to when I'm reading and I zone out a lot.

I am not a crafty person (in the craft sense - sometimes I can be conniving, especially when playing Monopoly...) but I can do this, I enjoy it, and I impressed myself with the results.  Here's the finished portrait and a close-up so you can see the individual pixels.

And I'm pleased to say, my mum absolutely loved it when I gave it to her and her husband for Christmas.  It is not the cheapest hobby in the world, but is so repetitive and enjoyable, that you don't need to concentrate too much, it's almost a form of meditation and you get something pretty at the end of it.

Weekly Update No2

This week, I am exactly the same weight as I was this point last week.  I'm counting that as a positive, considering I haven't done any Body Groove this week, nor have I eaten the best.

Back to being busy, means it is harder to get time at home to exercise.  Today, both my girls are ill, so I will be able to fit it in today, as I've had to cancel all their HE groups and my tutoring.  Neither girl is eating very much atm, they both have a bit of a fever, feeling sick and are very lethargic.  I should have known something was wrong on Saturday, when my elder daughter came home from her theatre class and fell asleep on the sofa!

I still am not back in the habit of using my slow cooker.  It doesn't help that since Christmas, I've had loads of food piled on top/next to it (like crackers for cheese, etc) that don't fit in our cupboards.  We don't have much cupboard space at the best of time, so when we have extra food around, everything just overflows everywhere.  I would like to get the kitchen redone, but I don't see the point if there's not going to be any more cupboard space, as the area to work in is so small. My husband mentioned yesterday about the possibility of having the whole downstairs redone, to have an open plan kitchen/livingroom area.  Apart from the money issue (ie we have none), I'm not against that idea, but it seems quite daunting, and I'd have to study lots of plans before we agreed to anything - and I'm not sure how many people would b willing to draw up plans in the detail I'd like to see for free, before we commit to anything.  It's not helped by a friend having renovation work, only for her builders to try and charge nearly double the agreed quote, and then walking out leaving it unfinished.


 Back to my weightloss plan, though.  This week, I would like to try and lose 1kg.  I am drinking plenty of water, but I do need to up my veg intake again, as it's too easy when tired, to reheat frozen beige food.  Looking over this blog, I found this post where I said I would do some stretches every day.  Well, that fell by the wayside... but if I can't
fit in 30min of body groove, then doing a few dynamic stretches in the morning will help tone my body a little - at the very least, it's better than doing nothing.