Ok, if you follow my facebook page I said my first post this year would be about books, but I've decided to give a brief overview about everything instead. And if you don't follow my facebook page, why on earth not?? Tut, tut, tut. 😜 Here's the link again, so you have no excuse: https://www.facebook.com/MusingsMiddleagedMum
So, I purposely had a break for Christmas, and it was needed. I've come back this year feeling refreshed and ready to go. Last week, however, I went to get ready for my first tutorial and my my computer had died.
Not only did the Automatic Repair not work, it wouldn't move off this screen. I cancelled my tutorials and left it to my techy husband (they do have their uses, lol). He used some techy magic to recover most of my files, but he couldn't get windows to work. We wiped everything, started again, and windows still wouldn't work. He even installed Linux, and even that operating system wouldn't work. The hard disk was dead as dead can be.
After having to handwrite a comparison spreadsheet (I'm not joking, I am that geeky, and it took two A4 pages), I decided upon and bought a new laptop. Yey! There are a couple of snags* with it, that I'm sure will be able to be sorted quickly, but overall I'm really pleased with it. * There is automatically a background noise remover thingy on the microphone, which would be great, except now it stops my headset working with zoom when tutoring. The only way to bypass is to not use my headset, so all my tutees are rewarded with sounds of my dogs barking in the background. Should be a simple fix; husband will look at it later.
* Everything on my laptop is automatically saving to One Drive. I use One Drive for music and photos, but all my large tutoring or Ed Free documents, I do not need nor want saving all the time. It means I'm getting lots of notifications saying One Drive is full, and adverts where I can buy infinite (nearly) space for only £££ each month. Again, a simple fix, but I'm ignoring it for now.
What's new with me? Well, yesterday was 20 years since I asked my (now) husband to go out with me. Very forward of me, but he was/is shyer than me, if you can believe such a thing. Actually, if you know me now, you probably can believe it, but 20 years ago I was a mouse in comparison. I thought he fancied me, and asked a couple of my friends a few months earlier, and they said that I was just imagining it, and he was just a good friend. Anyway, in the January, we went back to uni and there was a party a friend of a friend was throwing and we tagged along. We got drunk enough for me to ask him if he fancied me and for him to say yes - and then I ignored it and continued with the party! It wasn't until I couldn't sleep that night, because everything was rolling around my head, that I went up to his room and asked him to go out with me, and then went back downstairs to go to sleep. I then didn't see him for 24hrs, because I was at a football match, and wasn't sure if he would remember or if he thought it was a mistake or what. Ancient history it is, as we're now married, 17 years this coming August, with 2 kids, 2 dogs, and still happy.
I have started reading again - hurray! I don't think I had read anything seriously since about October. I tend not to read much in December, because it's tacky Christmas movie season, but I had missed reading. I don't have as much time to read as previously, only an hour on a Saturday of dedicated reading time (except when/if I read a good book, and it takes over my life for a few days), but I'm glad to have started reading regularly again.
And I've started calorie counting. After hitting my heaviest weight ever after Christmas, I am properly tracking my food in MFP and have been meal prepping. I'm only on week 2, so it's not an established habit yet, but I have lost weight already, which keeps me motivated.
I'm going to my first naturist/clothing optional event for what seems like forever tonight. Covid, of course, has stopped everything, but theatres are starting to reopen, so my husband and I are going to a clothing optional showing tonight, so that will be fun.
What's not new with me? Still tutoring maths. Still involved in the home ed world. Still have my personal trainer twice a week. Still going to church. Still ferrying the girls to dance every night of the week. Still me.
And that's about it! I hope you all had a good Christmas and New years. I did. And that you are well xx
I can't believe it's nearly a month since I last posted anything on this blog! I've got lots to say, but want to post it all separately, so I'll give a quick overview now, and hopefully will find some time in the not-to-distant future to actually write properly.
This past month, it was my 16th wedding anniversary, (did I tell you in July that my hair is no longer purple? It's red now), I went to Back To the 80s & 90s Festival by myself and had a fab time, I finished reading all the books on my A-Z Challenge list, plus the rest of the Ugly Girl series, I went to London twice with the family to see 2 different shows, I've started going out with friends again in an evening, DD2 had her 11th birthday yesterday, and today was her first day of Summer School (transition week) before starting secondary in September. I am officially not home educating any more! I have some new tutees and some old ones lined up for me to start tutoring again. I am still involved in HE politics, despite it being the summer holidays. And I'm still seeing my PT. I know I didn't update you guys with my last set of progress photos (even I can see a difference now compared to how I looked when I started!), but I'm due to take my next set this coming weekend. I'll also be taking new measurements, and will have a look to see if I am finally starting to lose weight. Since I started with her in April, I have only put on weight, so it will be good to see if that finally starts to change! And, as I finished my A-Z of fiction titles I need to set myself a new challenge (based on the books I already have on my kindle that I haven't read yet). As, on my kindle, I can only sort by Recent, Title or Author, I suppose I'm going to go back to Fiction Authors. Unlike last time, however, I will not be buying any books to fill-in the letters I'm missing.
My PT came on Friday for the first time in a couple of weeks (due to a combination of illness, self-isolation and camping) and boy, did it hurt! It was fun (in a masochistic way) - my PT had 5 A4 pages, which I had to select randomly. Each one had a different set of exercises, that I had to repeat 4 times. There was a mix of all the exercises that we had done so far, including boxing, slam balls, weight lifting, Russian twists, sit ups and more. Afterwards, I ached. Normally, I don't ache until the next day, but I ached Friday afternoon, all day Saturday, all day Sunday, and this morning my quads were still aching!
Incidentally, if you've been following my FB page (and if not, please CLICK HERE to like and follow me!), you'll know my husband completed Race To The Stones at the weekend. Just because he covered 100 kilometres, does not mean that his legs ache more than mine after an hour in my garden, lol!
This morning, my PT returned and made me start off with a plank. Because I am trying to push myself, I asked her not to tell me the time until 1min30secs had gone past, and then every 20 seconds after that. Today I managed a whopping 2min 08secs in a plank! Beating my previous PB by 11 seconds, and I think I may have been able to go slightly longer had it not been pouring with rain, as my rain coat was much too warm as the hood fell over my head.
The rest of the session today was mainly arms, shoulders and abs. I don't really ache right now, but know it'll hit me tomorrow. At least my legs have stopped aching, so it no longer hurts when trying to go up or down stairs. 😃
My poor neglected blog! I'm so sorry! You wouldn't believe how busy I have been - actually, you would, given how sporadic my posting has been so far this year. I'm hoping I'll have finally turned a corner now, but who knows? I have been posting mildly more often direct on my facebook page, so if you don't follow it, you should do so now: https://www.facebook.com/MusingsMiddleagedMum .
The Education Select Committee's Inquiry into Home Education is still ongoing. I have given further submissions, but that hasn't been published yet, nor my personal one. I'm still involved in helping home educators locally and nationally know their rights, answer their questions, deal with their Local Authorities, etc. I'm also talking at an upcoming HE conference, so I hope people will have plenty of questions as I'm not good at talking about nothing, lol. I suppose I should find some FAQs and have them on standby so I can ask and answer my own questions if I need to. Details of the conference: https://www.learnfree.org.uk/
Have I mentioned that DD2 got into the same school as DD1? So from September, I'll no longer be a home educator! <sob> I'll still be involved in the community and the politics, but will be stepping down from some of my adminning duties on FB as I don't think it's right that a non-home educator admins local groups.
Weightloss has been a bit up and down. More up than down, but hopefully that has turned a corner now. I've got a(nother) new exercise routine that I've paid for so will be sticking with for a while. Had my first session on Monday, and boy, did I ache afterwards!!! I hope to be doing this every Monday and Friday for the foreseeable, so hopefully that will have an impact on my weight. I've also decided to try some monetary incentive. From a starting weight of 94kilos, for every 1kg I can keep off for a solid 3 weeks, I will put a tenner to one side. The Pros: If I get down to my dream weight, I'll have £300 to spend on new clothes. The Cons: My weight is up and down like a yoyo, so I could be averaging , for example, 75kilos, and then randomly have 1 day of 82kilos. But, it's added incentive, so lets see if it works.
I haven't listened to my hypnotherapy CDs for a while either - I've not even had time to take 30min for myself at home. But, now that the girls' dance classes are back in the studios, I've magically got more time for reading (because I am sat in my car waiting!) so hope to start writing reviews again.
So sorry, again, for the silent treatment. I hope to be posting more regularly again soon xx
Things are going well! I have actually lost weight this week - half a kilo, but it all counts. I'm not actively "dieting" at the moment, I am merely tracking what I eat, eating mindfully when I do, and I am meaning to keep up with the hypnotherapy (which I haven't for a few days...). Being aware of what I'm eating, eating slowly and knowing that I need to write down and track whatever it is that I do eat, is helping me make wiser choices.
Exercise-wise, I'm going for a 3Km walk every other day. This week there are free BodyGroove sessions lunchtime and evenings, that I haven't been able to join yet, but I do recommend them nonetheless (the link is on my FB page).
In other news, I am even more busy! I have more people asking for maths tuition, and I'm having to turn them away, as working full days Wednesdays and Thursdays (plus the prep around them) is enough for me. When DD2 goes to school, I'll try and spread them throughout the week, and so should be able to fit more people in (since 5 half days is more than 2 full days).
In the Home Ed world, I've been busy doing lots of admin stuff, as well as actually helping people with advice and support. I know I'm a freak, but I don't mind admin. It keeps everything organised and you get a sense of achievement when it's done. It's a shame I don't feel the same way about tidying and cleaning my house!
I have also said I would host some sessions on Engineering for this year's HE Science Fair. Last year I offered maths tuition, though only the people who I already tutored wanted any, lol. This year, I've decided to go for a more hands-on demo, looking at what engineering is, and then 3 separate types of engineering. I'm not a natural teacher (of a group, as opposed to a 1:1 tutor), so I will be pre-recording them, and the rest of each hour, they can do the activities themselves at home. I have planned what I'm going to do, and what I'm going to talk about; I just need to write some decent notes (beyond my current "talk about engineering"!) and then get around to doing it before March.
And then there's my FutureLearn courses that I have been doing. I got loads done over Christmas, so signed up to Unlimited, and since then finding the time to study is difficult. I had planned to do it Monday afternoons, but then other things come along - like yesterday, I was sat at my computer 9am-7pm, including lunch, doing HE admin stuff that needs to be done because the government's HE Inquiry is still going on.
And to keep me sane, I need to find time to read. We've had to take our pup to the vets a bit recently (D&V, though she's declared fit again now), so I've been able to use that time to read, as we're not allowed in the vets due to coronavirus. A couple of times when I've tried to read during the day, I've fallen asleep, which isn't a good habit to get into as I have far too much stuff to do.
I
have to admit, I’m getting tired now. In case you didn’t see my
update on facebook yesterday, not only am I reading through this and
watching the Education Select Committee on Parliament.tv, but I am
also trying to help out local HErs, who have been wrongly issued
s437s by our LA. They have since come back and said ‘oops, that’s
meant to be s436a’ but they still want loads of unlawful
information, and for it to be provided by this Friday, and with the
threat of an SAO. I am pleased to see that some HErs are fighting
back, each in their own way, either complaining by letter or email,
or asking for the corrected letters with a new time frame in which to
respond, or by seeking legal action to prevent this from happening to
others. In other news, I have been asked to join a panel of people
who represent HErs, so that is exciting and I’d like to know more
about that. And finally (for this rambly intro, anyway), I had a
response from ISOS to my email that I mentioned in Part 1. I have to
say, I’m not happy with the response, as they seem to want to wash
their hands of the damage and have ignored the affects by
ridiculously grouping HErs with CME.
My
letter:
“Good
morning,
I
have read through your recent publication on Children Missing
Education (Nov 2020) and have noted that you have used the phrase
“home education” 30 times, and “home educated” 37 times.
Given that Home Educated children are not Children Missing
Education, I am interested in why your document seems to fail to make
the distinction between these two separate groups? Similarly,
Off-rolling is not the fault of home educators, but that of schools.
Furthermore,
in your Bibliography, I cannot see a single Home Education
organisation listed has having been used in this research, and there
are many within the UK. Given this document is to influence
policy, and many of these recommendations will have a negative impact
for home educators, I would like to know why our needs have not been
considered?
I hope I am wrong, and I have misread or
overlooked a reference within the document itself. Please can
you point me towards which Home Education sites or organisations you
have used to complete this document?
Kind
Regards,”
Their
response:
“Thank
you for taking the time to read our report and for getting in touch.
In commissioning us to undertake the research the Local Government
Association asked us to:
Develop
a national picture of trends in numbers and characteristics of
children and young people who are missing a formal full-time
education;
Understand
the routes whereby children and young people end up missing
education;
Assess
the factors which are contributing to the increasing numbers of
children missing education;
Describe
the impact of children and young people missing out on education;
Identify
good practice in how local authorities and their partners can reduce
the numbers of children missing education;
Our
focus has therefore, throughout, been on those children who are not
receiving their entitlement to education, rather than those who are.
For the purposes of the research we define ‘formal, full-time
education’ as an education that is “well-structured, contains
significant taught input, pursues learning goals that are appropriate
to a child or young person’s age and ability and which supports
them to access their next stage in education, learning or
employment”. We define full-time as 18hrs per week. Under our
definition, we believe children who are successfully educated
at home would be receiving formal full-time education. We do not
equate formal full time education with school-based education and we
try to state as clearly as we can in the report that in the majority
of cases children who are electively home educated are receiving
a formal full time education, in the way that we have defined it for
the research. We state:
“not
all the children who are taken out of school at the instigation of
their parents end up missing out on their entitlement to education.
Far from it. Indeed, many parents provide an excellent education
for their children outside of school. However, the more parents
who opt for this route either out of desperation (because they simply
do not believe that the education they can access is meeting their
child’s needs) or out of fear of or hostility to the actions that
schools and government take to safeguard the well-being and
development of children, the more children are likely to miss out on
their entitlement to education.”
We
believe that we have not conflated the two groups of home educated
children and children missing education. However, we do believe from
the evidence that we have gathered from parents, headteachers and
local authorities that there is a subset of children who are
electively home educated in name, but in practice are receiving very
little education. These may be children
whose
parents have agreed to home-educate under duress (possibly as a
result of an off-rolling action by a school) but are unable or
unwilling to actually provide education,
whose
parents are home educating as a last resort but who do not feel they
have the skills or capacity to undertake this duty successfully
(often in cases where the school system is unable to meet the
special educational needs of a child)
whose
parents are using home education as a way to avoid legitimate action
for non-attendance at school or occasionally even as a means to
hinder safeguarding concerns being followed up.
These
clearly represent a minority of those children currently electively
home educated, but they are a concern. It is also a concern that
there is currently no definitive way of telling what percentage of
home educated children are not receiving a suitable education.
We
do not single out home education as the only possible route whereby
children might be missing out on their entitlement to education. For
example, we also draw attention to children who are currently on a
school roll and missing out on education either because they are
attending part-time, or because they are absent for long periods or
because they have been subject to multiple exclusions. Similarly, we
suggest that a proportion of children in alternative provision may
also be missing out on education.
In
terms of how we carried out our research, our focus on the children
not receiving their entitlement to education guided our choice
of organisations to engage. As such, we worked with the LGA and the
National Network of Parent Carer Forums to gather feedback from
parents who had direct experience of the issues we were exploring
through the research.
I
hope this helps to shed some further light on our research.
Best
wishes
Natalie”
I
think this does warrant some follow-up, but I haven’t got my head
around what it should be yet.
Back
to the report itself…
“Chapter
4: What is the impact on children, families and society of children
missing education?”
“Of
course, as we have outlined elsewhere in this report, the decision
for an individual child to leave a specific school might be the right
decision. There were examples in our parents’ survey of where that
particular choice has resulted in better outcomes for the child in
question. … However, in such cases, the parent has stepped in to
provide or commission the education that the child needs.”
And
that is exactly what ALL Home Education is – the parent
facilitating the learning of the child. It does not have to be
structured, it does not have to be formal. It does not have to
follow a timetable, a curriculum nor a school day. It does not have
to have a set number of hours each week (to be considered full time).
“The
detrimental impacts we discuss in the following sections are where
the child does not end up receiving formal, full-time education that
is suitable for his or her needs.”
I
repeat: It does not have to be structured, it does not have to be
formal. It does not have to follow a timetable, a curriculum nor a
school day. It does not have to have a set number of hours each week
(to be considered full time).
EHE
is not CME!
The
report then goes on to explain the impact/potential impact of a child
missing education. I don’t disagree with many of these points,
only to say that an electively home educated child is NOT missing
education, so should not even be mentioned in reports such as this.
“A
child or young person that misses full-time, formal education lacks
consistent access to teaching ... In missing out, either intermittent
lessons or large periods of a term, a child may miss important work
and fall behind peers.”
It
explicitly states in the EHE Departmental Guidance, that HErs do NOT
have to worry about keeping to the same levels as schooled peers.
“Local
authorities emphasised that it was not just missing out on key
periods of a school year impacting attainment that was a problem. But
that missing out on careers advice and progress meetings with
teachers and mentors to plan for the future also contributed to later
low employability. This is borne out in the research - the Badman
Review…”
Head.
Meet. Desk.
Mention
his name to any Home Educators in the past 10years or so, and you
will be greeted with a collective sigh. Mr Badman doesn’t like home
educators so was doing all in his power to stop it.
If
you want some more info (because frankly, I don’t have the mental
capacity to break it down and simplify it right now, here are some
links:
A
thorough google search will bring up many, many more.
Humorously,
this video of The Badman Song still brings a smile to my face.
“The
Office of National Statistics has also quantified the link between
low attainment and employability in the general population. …
Evidence provided by local authorities, parents, schools and national
bodies, as well as existing data and research, therefore, suggests
missing out consistently on education affects the educational
attainment for children and young people, which in turn has long-term
ramifications for employability through into later life.”
And
this is one of the problems with having a narrow, school-based view
of what education looks like. Home Educators are very aware that
there is no timescale for learning, and just because something has
not been learned by a specific age, it does not mean that it can
never be learned.
“Mental
health and wellbeing
Unpacking
the relationship between mental health and missing education is
complex. As we have set out already in this report, poor mental
health or emotional wellbeing, often linked to extreme anxiety, can
be one of the factors that leads to a child missing out on formal
full-time education. It was certainly a key consideration for many of
the parents who responded to our survey.”
If
you remove “formal full-time”, then it doesn’t read too bad.
“In
a very small number of cases local authorities identified how the
unsupported mental health needs of isolated young people who were not
in school had tragically resulted in suicide.”
“Not
in school” or “Children Missing Education”? They are clearly
two very different things. Almost unanimously, the anecdotal
evidence for Home Education says that the mental health of the
child/whole family improves once the child has deregistered, with
many parents wishing they had either made the change earlier, or that
their child had never gone to school in the first place.
It
would also be interesting to compare this statistic, with the number
of schooled children who tragically commit suicide.
“As
the NSPCC’s briefing on ‘Home education: learning from serious
case reviews’ (March 2014) outlines, children who are home educated
become isolated because they have no right to independent access to
friends, family but also professional agencies who could provide
distinct and specialist support.”
Well,
NSPCC is another group that doesn’t like HE due to stereotypes and
myth. In reality, Wendy Charles Warner reviewed all SCRs recently (I
can’t remember the date off the top of my head, but was in the past
couple of years – I’m sure a google would find it; I’ve even
mentioned it in previous blog posts) and in NONE of them was HE a
contributing factor in the death or serious neglect of the child.
“It
must be emphasised that although legally, home educated children have
the same rights to access mental health support in the form of CAMHS,
by not being in school, a child will have access to fewer trained
professionals who can spot warning signs around mental health, such
as school nurses, counsellors, external mentors and in-school
specialist support.”
Not
true at all. Any caring parent will want the best for their child,
and home educating parents are no different. If anything, HEing
parents often have to fight in order to access various support and
professionals! Having a lack of access is not, and should not, be
blamed on the parents.
And
incidentally, “school nurses” have a responsibility for all
children of Compulsory School Age (CSA), whether in school or not.
“Social
and emotional development
The
lack of social interaction experienced by children missing education
and the potential negative impact of this was a key issue highlighted
in our regional workshops.”
That
is simply because you have not asked people involved with home
education; individuals, families nor organisations. Pre-covid
(hands-up, things are a bit trickier atm with the constant lockdowns
and tiered lockdowns), in my local area, we had a minimum of 5 groups
or meets listed for every week day. As a home educator, you couldn’t
do everything, but there literally isn’t enough time in the day!
Home educators in other parts of the country report similar things.
If you live in a particularly rural or isolated area, you may have to
make a bit more of an effort, but with technology (proven, thanks in
part to covid), there is social interaction even if you so have to
stay at home for a period.
“Local
authorities expressed concern about children’s low self-esteem and
lack of confidence to interact with peers as a result of being
removed from or missing full-time education and the possibility of
poor emotional development in the longer term.”
Any
evidence for this? Noting, again, that being removed from education
(I’m assuming being expelled) or missing education (I’m assuming
truancy) is different and will have different impacts on the child,
compared to one who has been removed from school in order to be
EHE.
“This is echoed by significant research into the
importance of social interaction and the negative impacts (both short
and long-term) of a child that is not socialising sufficiently early
or consistently. Key impacts of a lack of social interaction include:
low confidence and self-esteem, in particular the lack of belief in a
child’s ability to manage stressful situations; anxiety; social
withdrawal; and a lack of ability to make friends and therefore, form
supportive social networks throughout their lives.”
I
wonder if any research has been done on the negative impacts (both
short and long term) of a child that is being forced to socialise
against their will, and consistent negative interactions, such as
bullying?
“The
impact that social isolation can have on a child’s life are
comprehensively examined in ‘Social isolation in childhood and
adult inflammation’ (August 2014) by Lacey et al. The study uses
data from the National Child Development Study (NCDS) which looked at
babies born in 1958 and examined them at age intervals until they
were 50 years old.”
That
report is:
https://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S0306453014003126
and says about its limitations: “There
was no formal measure of childhood social isolation available,
however our measure comprises a question relating to peer withdrawal
(isolation) and a question relating to peer rejection (bullying)
which likely represent different aspects of social isolation. When we
looked separately at each of these questions, the associations we saw
were largely driven by the bullying item although the other item
about preferring to be alone was still associated with raised CRP
without considering the bullying item (results not shown).”
Given
that Home education was less
common in 1958, surely it can be assumed that the participants of
this study were schooled children, and as such it cannot be assumed
to be correct when discussion home educated children?
“Therefore,
their definition of social isolation is not identical to the social
isolated experienced by children missing education. Nonetheless, it
seems reasonable that similar issues might also be experienced by
children who are regularly missing out on exposure to peers and a
variety of people.”
No,
I don’t consider that to be reasonable, at all. (Again, not to
mention that EHE kids are rarely socially isolated.)
I
do feel like I’m repeating myself a lot, so apologies for that,
though I think it does bear repeating.
“Safeguarding
Throughout
our research a key message that has come out of the evidence gathered
is that schools and educational settings are a “protective factor”
in society…”
Instead,
I’d wager that schools (and in turn various authorities) consider
that schools and educational settings are a protective factor, rather
than there being actual evidence to indicate this. In the highly
publicised SCRs, EHE has never been a contributing factor, and all
the children were already known to the relevant authorities (not
limited to the LAs or Social Services).
“Crime
and exploitation”
This
whole section is mainly linking exclusions to crime.
“On
families and society Local authorities that we engaged in our
research were keen to express the broader impact children missing
education had on families and society as a whole. From our
discussions, the following themes emerged:
1.
Family breakdown
2.
Worklessness and poverty
3.
Reinforcing stereotypes”
It
would be interesting to see if there has been any research done
relating to these themes and home education? Many people report to
having grown closer as a family, through home education, because they
see their children (and in turn, the children see their siblings) all
the time, not just when they are tired and hungry after a long school
day, when they return home feeling overwhelmed and all the anguish
and frustration gets released in an explosion. As this happens day
after day, family relationships do not have the time to repair as for
large sections of the day, they are either asleep or separated at
school.
“Family
breakdown”
“Having
a child at home for extended periods of time can put strain on
parents who are not necessarily trained in home education. With
parents unable to leave a child alone, some mentioned how they had
lost friendships and/or opportunities to socialise themselves. For
some parents, they stated how high stress and home education had
contributed to bouts of anxiety and depression.”
Firstly
there is no training required to Home Educate your own children. The
EHE Departmental Guidance states that parents are not required to
have reached a specific academic level in order to HE. Whilst in
recent years, you can now get diplomas in HE, they are actually
totally unnecessary. Home Education is all about facilitating the
education, not that you have to be highly qualified and have to teach
from your own knowledge, what it is the child wants to learn. And
regarding the impact of HE on a parent’s mental health, I would
counter and say (anecdotally, as I have not done the research on
this) that forcing a
parent to offer a formal structured education to their children is
likely to do more harm, whereas a child who is allowed to follow
their own interests and learn autonomously is more likely to have
mentally healthy parents. (Please note the emphasis on forcing.
I’m a strong believer that they style of home education that suits
the child and the family is by its very nature the best for that
family, whether that be structured, unstructured, eclectic or
anything else.)
“Worklessness
and poverty
Both
from our parent survey and through discussions with local authority
officers, many voiced concerns around the financial implications that
a child missing education can have. This was particularly the case if
a parent had to quit their job to look after or educate their child
at home. But it was also problematic when families had to pay for
resources for home education or for specialist treatments, advocates
or professional reports if trying to support the child’s special
educational needs.”
When
a family decides to electively home educate a child, they do take
full financial responsibility for the education, whether that be
outsourcing specific groups/activities, buying equipment and books,
paying for exams etc. It is important that a parent realises this
before they decide to HE, and yet another reason why Off-rolling is
so bad.
However,
it is possible to HE and work at the same time, whether that be
part-time or full-time, in the home or outside it. It is even
possible to HE as a single parent on benefits. Yes,
there may be lifestyle adaptations needed, but just because the
family may no longer be bringing in the big bucks, does not mean that
HE should be inaccessible or inadvisable.
“Reinforcing
stereotypes”
Other
than this report reinforcing stereotypes about HE, this paragraph
doesn’t apply to us.
“Chapter
5: What Councils and local partners can and are doing
Area
1: Early identification and support
Area
2: Preventative and restorative action”
“...there
was not a single right approach to managing managed moves, fair
access and the return of pupils who had been electively home
educated;” point of
information: not all pupils who were HE have been to school before,
and additionally, they may not need active extra support for the
transition to school.
“One
way in which the principles of fairness and collective responsibility
have been put into effect in Telford and Wrekin relates to their
approach to children who are Electively Home Educated. In Telford and
Wrekin, the Council and school leaders have agreed that the fairest
approach to elective home education is that where possible any pupil
returning from being electively home educated returns to their
previous mainstream school. This has been agreed as an important
means of ensuring that elective home education is not used as a way
of removing a child from a school where it is not in the child’s
best interests …”
I
can see this being good to
prevent off-rolling. However, life isn’t always that
straightforward. What about the case where a child is being
incredibly bullied and so the parents remove them from the school
roll to electively home educate them; after some time (years), the
child’s confidence has built back up again, and they want to try
school. Will they be forced back into the same school with the
bullies?
“As
in many areas the rising numbers of children being electively home
educated has been a concern in Warwickshire.”
Why?
That is a deeply biased and discriminatory response by Warwickshire
council.
“The
Children Missing education team have agreed with schools and parents
that they will implement a two week ‘cooling off period’ for
every new request for elective home education during which they will
work with the school and the family to explore the issues and try and
find a resolution.”
It
depends what this ‘cooling off period’ is specifically for. When
a parent decides to EHE and deregisters their child, the school must
remove that child’s name immediately. There are no ifs, buts nor
exceptions to this that I am aware of. However, if the school comes
to an agreement with the LA to not fill that child’s place
immediately, but wait two weeks, that does not seem as harmful to HE
to me. Yes, there is a risk of scope creep, but there is with all
this stuff.
“Area
3: Re-engaging pupils who have been out of education
Area
4: Monitoring and tracking”
This
is the area most of concern to HErs, not lease because in the EHE
Departmental Guidance it states the LA has no duty to monitor the
education.
“Lastly,
local authorities underscored the importance of having
well-established processes for tracking children who are not in
formal, full-time education or at risk of missing out.”
Tracking
children who are missing education is a priority. EHE is not CME.
“It
also requires that the system has the capacity to follow-up cases
where it is not known whether a child is in formal, full-time
education, or the reasons why a child is not attending school
full-time are not known, or in some cases to confirm that a child is
actually receiving education where they are reported to be being
educated.”
And
informal enquiries are absolutely fine. Immediately issuing a s347
notice to new HErs or long-term HErs who have been told their report
is satisfactory, is not fine. <cough>Swindon<cough>
“In
response to rising numbers of children being electively home
educated, and a greater proportion of these children having a history
of exclusions, child protection concern or historic non-attendance,
Portsmouth and its schools have developed the most recent collective
protocol. Now all headteachers have agreed that they will not take a
child off a school roll until there has been a meeting between the
school, the local authority and the parent or carer. Schools have
also agreed that any child who has been electively home educated for
less than six months will automatically return to the original school
roll if returning to mainstream education. In the interests of
openness and transparency the local authority has also committed to
reflecting numbers of electively home educated children back to
schools. In the year that the new protocol has been in operation
numbers of electively home educated children have begun to fall,
whereas previously they were rising rapidly.”
It
was my understanding that schools must remove a child’s name
immediately, and similarly (except for special schools and specific
circumstances) the LA do not have to agree to the child being EHE.
Any meeting requested by the school or LA at this stage is optional
(are the parents told that?) and the parents do not have to attend. I
have also heard that some schools are automatically reporting parents
who want to deregister their child directly to Social Services.
These heavy handed tactics, and people’s general fear of SS, is
more likely to have an effect.
I
will continue my, hopefully
final, part 5 on Friday, if I can’t squeeze it in tomorrow evening.
I thought I would do a shout-out to two local businesses.
Endless Pawsibilities is a dog training service run by the amazing Mel. She does (did before lockdown) group classes, which allow the socialisation of dogs as well as their humans being put through their paces as they learn how to get the best out of their pooches; and she does 1:1 lessons - and it is these that we have gone for. We have had two hours of training so far, and it has been really useful. The first session we looked at Sit and Come - I'd say Come is about 75% there, whereas Sit is a bit more hit and miss. She will sit for us when at home or in the garden, provided there is nothing more exciting there!
Today I had both girls with me and we talked about how to react when our puppy nips us, and tries to explore our hands and feet with her mouth. We also looked again at desensitising her to her harness and collar, and also the car. This is much harder as she is fearful. Though she is happy enough when out walking, she would rather not be anywhere near them at any other time.
I'm hoping in the next two weeks we can make progress with our pup before we see Mel again.
Fetch Groom is local dog grooming service run by Aggy and her team. She offers a myriad of different services for your dogs, from a basic trim, to something more extravagant. We went for the Puppy's First Groom and were not disappointed. Our dog was very relaxed and comfortable, and came back looking cute and young again. We'll be very happy to go back again in six weeks time.
If you don't follow me on Facebook (and if not, why not?!) you may not have seen the news that we have put down a deposit on a puppy. We can't bring her home for another fortnight, but we are in love with her already.
So, as is my way, I have immediately bought and read a load of books about dogs. Oh, maybe not a load, but I have bought two for myself and two for my girls. And yes, I have read them all already.
My name's Steve Mann and I've been a professional dog trainer and behaviourist for over 30 years. As founder of the Institute of Modern Dog Trainers, I've helped transform the lives of over 100,000 dogs and their families - and now I want to help you, too!
Whether you're living with a brand-new puppy, an adult dog or rescue dog, my methods will give you everything you need to know. Using simple, proven, science-based and ethical techniques, I'll show you how to have the best relationship with your pup, as well as teaching you how to get:
super-fast recalls, great loose lead walking, perfect manners and much, MUCH more...
I promise, it really is easy peasy and every tip, trick and lesson will bring you and your puppy closer together.
I'll see you on the other side.
This is a really well written book. It is casual enough that you feel like you are having a conversation with Steve, yet it is full of solid advice, ways to approach your pet, tips and tricks (though in reality, there is no trick, other than starting training your dog right and don't use violence or aggression to them).
I'm not going to go into what the book teaches too much, because this is a book that I think is worth you buying, but I now have a list of key words stuck to my fridge, and I feel more confident looking after a new member of the family.
If you have a puppy, or want one, read this book, and if you have an older dog, you may be interested to know that Steve Mann has a book aimed at older dogs too.
If you haven't read about The Collective before, why haven't you read this post or this one? Eh? Eh!
Anyway, here is the final video for You've Got a Friend in Me:
I am in here somewhere! And no, I haven't found me yet, lol. So if you see someone with fading purple hair and and a cowboy hat, let me know!
And if you think you're likely to want to join in, firstly, why haven't you joined in already? But more importantly, there is a new song starting soon, so if you did want to join in now is the perfect time. It's Sting's Every Little Thing She Does Is Magic.
There has been a lot of furore about the film Cuties being released on Netflix, not lease because of the artwork.
Netflix did issue an apology, however, by then the damage had been done.
Most of the fuss about this seems to have been in the US, so it had bypassed me. It was only on a couple of FB groups I'm in that this has been discussed, with articles and tweets showing both sides of the 'debate'.
Recently, however, I have been seeing more friends in the UK sharing how this film promotes paedophilia and sexualises preteens, it is encouraging children to sexualise themselves etc and even one video where the person is calling for the actors' parents to be prosecuted and have their children removed for allowing them to be in this film(!), yet the articles I've seen suggest that this isn't the case at all. I have asked people who are sharing this material whether they have seen it, and they admit that they haven't, but are warning other parents about it... So, this morning I watched it for myself.
First of all, this is a French (I think) film that has been dubbed
into English. The dubbing isn’t to bad, though it is obvious in
some places and there are parts (I don’t know if these are an
African language, or Arabic) that haven’t been dubbed at all.
Secondly, it is not a ‘feel good’ film. There is no happy
ending, and is the type of film where I get to the end and think ‘so
what?’. Also, it is a 15. Now I know that a 15 is only a rating,
and it doesn’t stop kids watching a film (and may even make it more
desirable), but for children, this is a boring film. Even for me, it
was quite boring, and I only watched it to find out what all the fuss
was about. (Yes, yes, clearly their advertising strategy
worked…)
So, what happens in the film?
A girl,
Amy, moves to a French city and doesn’t know anybody. Coming from
an Islamic background, there is a bit of a culture shock as she
notices other children her age dancing and dressing differently to
herself. She spies on them and decides that she wants to be more
like them, so unbeknownst to her mum, she gets a cropped top and
tries to change her image.
As Amy lives in the same block
of flats at the girls, she gets into her good books and they allow
Amy to be friends with them. The girls clearly have no real
understanding of boys/men, and are discussing how long a boy’s
penis is and they persuade Amy, with her newly stolen phone, to film
a boy using a urinal. The boy shouts at Amy, and the girls are
disappointed that they can’t see anything.
Amy does film
the girls’ dance troupe, Cuties, and then spends hours alone in her
bathroom at home learning the dance moves. After a fight between two
of the members of Cuties, Amy is able to take her place as she has
already learned the routine. Amy tries to add to the girls routine,
by searching the internet for other dance moves, and falls upon lots
of twerking and, for want of a better phrase, women dry-humping the
floor.
Meanwhile, Amy’s dad is getting remarried, Amy
starts her period and “becomes a woman”, and she is now getting
lots of attention from boys due to the way she dresses and how she
acts. With her friends, she sneaks into Lazer Quest, gets caught,
pleads innocence and then dances provocatively to prevent the
cops/their parents being called.
The
person from whom Amy stole the mobile phone (he is either family or a
family friend), discovers Amy has it, and when he tries to get it
back, she locks herself in the bathroom and takes the equivalent of a
dick pic. She then gets bullied for that, other people ask the rest
of the Cuties for similar photos and they throw her out of the group,
and the previous girl gets called back in.
At the end of
the film is the big dance competition. Amy decides she wants to be
in the competition, gets her costume on and walks along the river
seeing the girl who has taken her place. Amy pushes her in the
river, and after checking she has found a buoy to hold on to, Amy
runs to the competition, ready to dance. In front of everybody, the
girls dance their very sexual dance and it is not well received by
the audience or the judges. Before the end of the dance, Amy stops
and breaks down in tears and runs to her fathers wedding. She gets
told off by her great aunty for dressing like a whore, but her mum
sticks up for her, and the film ends with her dressed in jeans
playing jump rope with other kids.
One of the things that has been said about
this film, is that it encourages kids to spy and film in bathrooms.
It really does not. As I’ve said, I can’t imagine any preteens
actually wanting to watch this film, but the scene in question
certainly wouldn’t encourage anyone else to act this way.
The
dance moves are highly sexual, and that is what this film is trying
to highlight – the hypersexualisation of our kids. Having watched
it, I don’t believe this film is encouraging children to act that
way. As a dance-mum (albeit classical dance), whose girls have been
in dance competitions (so I know all about the skin-tight costumes,
bright make-up and false eyelashes), I was interested to see what
this film said about that. In short, it didn’t. The routine that
the girls have learned is from MTV-style dance videos. As many
children, do, the characters simply copy dance moves that they have
seen adults perform. And yes, it looks ridiculous. Even ignoring
the fact that twerking is of African origin, as is the character Amy,
these are kids pulling silly poses. It does not look “sexy” in
the slightest, just ridiculous, and I would throw the question back
at anyone who can look at an 11yo as a sexual object.
Allegedly,
when the girls are dancing, there are a lot of “crotch shots”.
Again, this isn’t true (assuming crotch to mean from the front, not
from the back). The camera does occasionally zoom in on the girls’
behinds, but this is because it is [meant to be] Amy with her mobile
phone, and her fascination with bums and womanly figures, after being
teased by the girls for having a flat bum herself.
One
accusation thrown at the film is true, but again, there is context.
At one point, the girls are learning how to twerk, so they are using
their hands to move one another’s bodies. This is not done in a
sexual way, but in trying to get the beat/rhythm of the moves so they
are all in time.
The girls do dance to get out of trouble
with the security guards at Lazer Quest, after already accusing one
of them as a pervert. This is often how girls learn about their own
sexuality, and boundaries, and “women’s wily ways” etc. It
isn’t always appropriate, and I don’t think this film is
suggesting that it is appropriate nor that any young girls watching
should try and emulate the characters.
Amy does take a
photo of her underwear/vulva (you can’t tell from the film), but
nothing is seen. She gets bullied for it in the film, called a
stripper and a whore, and is thrown out the dance troupe for it, so
neither is suggesting this is appropriate nor acceptable behaviour.
Lots of kids are
not taught about sex, relationships, personal health etc in an
appropriate or timely way. As such, they turn to peers or the
internet to guide them. It pains me to think that there are many
young people who think body hair is nasty, disgusting or unhygienic.
It pains me to think that there are many young people who think they
have to act a certain way, dress a certain way, do specific sexual
things, in order to be liked, wanted or desired. It pains me to
think of all these children who grow up to become adults and think
this is all normal behaviour.
So,
about this film: Would I recommend it?
Not particularly. Like I said
at the start, it’s quite boring (though I appreciate that I may not
be cultured enough to like this type of thing). If there was a happy
ending, or if there was some tension that could be resolved, or some
kind of progress in the film at all, but there really wasn’t. In
short, a girl tries to fit in, goes waaay too far, and ends up maybe
as a happy medium, but we don’t actually know. We don’t know if
she has any friends left. We are just left hanging. It’s not the
spawn of satan as some people think, and it certainly doesn’t
promote paedophilia any more than taking your kids to the beach
would, or simply a clothing catalogue. It does look at the emerging sexuality of young girls, but
this film is from the young girls’ pov (ie wanting to become sexy
and failing), rather than from an older man’s pov (ie looking on
them lecherously). And it didn’t give me the icky feeling that I
have felt when watching films whose material is much less taboo (I’m
looking at you: Indecent Proposal. Yuck!).
I mentioned a few weeks ago on my facebook page about my parents and the fact that, rather than making up a cancer care pack for my mum (as I had the first time she had chemo), I looked to buy one. There are a few websites out there now that sell various packs, but they all seem a bit too much money for what they are, in all honesty. If I'm going to be spending £80+, I'd rather choose exactly what goes into it.
That was, until I came across Cancer Support UK - they give away cancer care packs for free! Amazing! I decided to get one for my mum, and donate the full cost of it back to Cancer Support UK, but the fact that they are given away, so the cost isn't prohibitive for anyone undergoing cancer treatment is fantastic!
There are three different cancer care packs you can choose from: Cancer Pack, Chemo Pack, and Kids Pack. I chose the Chemo Pack as that is my mum's current treatment plan.
It took a good 2 weeks to arrive (I didn't order it time to be there before her chemo started) but my mum was really happy with it, and very impressed with what it contained. Everything has certainly been thought out with chemo in mind, and I know it will get a lot of use.
So if you know anyone who is having treatment for cancer, either share this with them or order from www.cancersupportuk.org on their behalf.
I missed last week's update - not just because it was a bad week for my weightloss. I genuinely was really busy. As I shared in my update on facebook we have been working hard to redecorate the girls' bedrooms, sort out all the toys that the no longer play with now they are getting older, and I'll eventually get my own study. This has actually taken most of my time, so I haven't worked any more on either the MosaiCraft I am currently working on, or the other project I mentioned a while ago. My hope, when I do get my study, is that I'll have a space where I can work and get the work done that I need to every day. In the same update, I mentioned on FB, that my mum's cancer has returned, and my dad now has prostate cancer. I did manage to visit them both in August, for which I am grateful. And, in addition to all that, it was both DD2's 10th birthday and my husband's 38th this past week, so I've been out for food a bit more that normal.
I had set myself the challenge of getting below 90kilos by September. Honestly, I have not done well, not least before of the aforementioned reasons. Technically I haven't failed yet - it's not September until tomorrow, but realistically I doubt it will happen. Hopefully a single week more will get me down to that weight.
I do have some positives though, despite my spike in weight: I am easily drinking a good amount of water at the moment, and I am exercising and going for walks. I have even signed up to do the 2020 Race For Life (in case anyone wants to sponsor me and can spare a pound or two, please click HERE) as a way to encourage me to keep going out. I even went out last week when it tipped down, and got absolutely soaked! But I did it, and the shower felt even better than usual afterwards!
So, for this week I am going to keep up the water, keep up the exercise, and I am going to eat more vegetables. Last night I ate cabbage steak topped with taco seasoning and cheese and it was delicious! Now schools are going back next week, I need to get back in the habit of eating properly and preparing meals in advance. And, I am yet again, going to try and break through the 90kilo barrier.
Throughout lockdown, I've been keeping my depression at bay by singing regularly. Unfortunately, my usual Adult Musical Theatre group has had to stop, however, I have been able to join The Collective - a virtual choir made up of many people around the world!
The Collective was started by Simon Lubkowski, a music teacher and barbershopper. His vision (I encourage you to read the About Section on the Facebook Page) has taken off, with a fantastic team of volunteers who are all encouraging everyone to do their best, and now with thousands of participants, singing their hearts out. Being part of the group, I can see the amazing amount of work that the leaders all do for free - from the admin, the tech team, to the music group and section leaders, to Simon himself, who seems to not need sleep at all! It is the type of production that people would gladly pay to be part of, but it is done solely for the love of music and spreading joy. It's amazing.
I missed out on the very first song (White Cliffs of Dover), but I have joined for three songs, and unfortunately have had to pull out again, because I'm just too busy to dedicate the time the latest song deserves.
The first of these songs was One Voice by Barry Manilow. Not being a Manilow fan (sorry! I don't dislike him, just couldn't care either way) I didn't know the song beforehand, so had to learn everything from scratch. The materials to learn the song, both the music script and audio of the song, plus individual parts (I sing soprano) are all provided to you as part of the collective. The music team then gets to work teaching everyone, over zoom, the melody, breath points, various singing and breathing techniques (ninja breaths!), multiple times a day, multiple days a week, across various time zones for the international singers.
One participant, Ian Walker, deserves special mention as he made an app for all the information you could possibly need: links to videos, audio, script, rehearsals etc all separated out into your section part (Soprano, Alto, Tenor, Bass or Solo), and adjusted according to your timezone. Very impressive!
Once the song is learnt, the music team then focuses on performance, how to put emotion in the song, and the tech team teaches how to record your final version and the technology you need. And, if that wasn't enough, they invite everyone participating to record themselves to gain feedback to improve their performance.
As I write this, I had a sense of deja vu, and I have written about this before, so sorry for the repetition. I will now get to the point of this post - the final video!
Recording it was a bit of a palaver, as I didn't have a good set-up, so I'd have to balance my laptop on a couple of boxes on an upturned bucket on my bed. Not only that, before this recording I woke up late, and had to rush to put my make-up on, before joining in the zoom meeting.
But that didn't put me off. After the tech team did their magic to integrate all the individual recordings from hundreds of people, to align them all, and then to get it to align with the video (that was recorded separately) the video was finally finished! Hours and hours and hours of work for the volunteers to produce this 8minute final video. I am there; briefly during the song itself, and more clearly in amongst the credits at the end.
