A Cross to Bear by Vince Vogel

This is a detective/thriller/suspense book.  Fifteen years past a cop is murdered, crucified outside his police station and had his throat cut.  Today the cop's daughter is found brutally murdered in similar circumstances.  The story winds around different threads and looks to involve criminal gangs who smuggle sex workers into the country.  Containing adult themes, this is certainly not a book for children or the faint hearted, but draws you in as you try to solve the crime for yourself and see that justice is served.

The blurb says:

Once the star of Scotland Yard, burnt out East London detective Jack Sheridan is now a washed up cop working a low end station, estranged from his family and haunted by his past. The discovery in woodland of a young woman nailed to a wooden cross sends Jack spiralling into a direct confrontation with that past when the woman is identified as the daughter of a murdered cop he once knew. With a serial killer the media are dubbing the ‘Crucifix Killer’ slaying working girls on his patch, Jack must face his own demons and uncover a series of terrible secrets if he is to find the twisted killer.

On his way to the Tunisian border, Alex Dorring is informed that his sister has been murdered. Dorring is Agent 192 of Uriel, a clandestine assassins wing of MI6. With revenge on his mind, Dorring makes his way to London and begins investigating her death in his own special way. As he moves like a ghost through the underbelly of the city, he meets Chloe, a troubled nineteen year old trying to escape the very people Dorring has come to hunt. Could this girl be the key to leading him to the killer?

As both men operate under entirely different rules, the death of one girl sees a bed of lies, sexual violence, murder and corruption come rising to the surface as East London descends into chaos.

This book is actually the start of a trilogy, but I read it as a stand-alone.  I really enjoyed it (and is currently free on Amazon), but a bit heavy/dark for me to read as a trilogy.  I have added the second two books to my wishlist, but will read something lighter in between.

Old 80s Films

Not just because I was born in '82, but also because my dad was quite authoritarian so if he didn't want something on TV we didn't watch it, but there seem to be loads of iconic films that people can't believe I haven't seen.  So, this year I have tried to make it my mission to watch them.

This year, I have watched Stand By Me, FAME (because DD1 was in a production of FAME), Saturday Night Fever (though technically that's a 70s film), Top Gun and last night I watched An Officer and a Gentleman.  Genuinely, I have only seen these films for the first time this year, mainly in thanks to incredulous friends who have loaned me their DVDs.

Last night's film was the best so far by a long way.  For starters, I don't like films where the characters what's the point?  Even in FAME though the characters did get their Performing Arts Degree at the end of the film, it was a bit meh.
don't grow or change.  So, if the end of the film is the same as the beginning (such as in Saturday Night Fever) I think

In An Officer and a Gentleman, otoh, the main character grows, there is a romance where both parties love each other equally, there is tragedy (Was it a requirement in the 80s that someone has to die?) but overall it is a feel good film.  I didn't think it was quite as romantic as is portrayed, and at the very end when her friend shouts "Way to go, Paula!" I'm thinking wtf, Paula hasn't done/achieved anything - but that could be because I'm from a more enlightened era where women have more to offer the world than nabbing themselves a good husband?

I am slowly reading through classic books that I haven't read (I aim for one a year as generally they're fairly long or need a bit more concentration than easy reads), and will try and catch up on classic films I've never seen.  Off the top of my head there's Casablanca, Schindler's List, It's a Wonderful Life to name a few.  What classic film do you think I need to watch?

Feeling a bit weird

I don’t know what’s wrong with me atm? I’m not sleeping well – mainly because DD2 seems to have regressed somewhat, and we’re having to stay with her until she falls asleep. Except last night, when it got to midnight and I gave up, and left her alone as I was knackered. I’ve always needed a lot of sleep, and by staying up late I’m oversleeping in the morning. And I don’t just mean, by an hour, no I mean I’m not waking up until nearly lunchtime. :(

Looking at the positive, I’m not that hungry when I wake up so I’m eating less and am losing weight (today I hit a New Low Weight!). However, my sleep is not restful. I’m having nightmares and night sweats (I don’t know if the latter is because of the menopause or the nightmares?), waking up still tired, finally waking up in the evening, and staying up late again.

In addition to the sleep, my digestion is going a bit funny atm. I have problems occasionally with my digestion where I get shooting pains in my stomach, bad cramps and pain that can easily last 24hours. For the past 5 years I’ve been keeping a food diary, just the days where I get pain, but there is no pattern to what I eat and what gives me pain. This has disappeared somewhat in the past year or so, after I’ve been having smoothies and eating more vegetables. It could be where I haven’t eaten well last week, but this week I have gone back to veggies most, and now I’ve started having pain again. Last night it wasn’t as bad, so I’m hoping it’s over now.

And then last night I got dizzy twice in an hour. Both times I was lying down reading, but all of a sudden I felt like I was falling and spinning. I had to grab the side until my head cleared. Again, this has happened in the past, one time I couldn’t drive because it didn’t clear quickly, but I don’t know what causes it or what caused it yesterday?

The Atheist Who Didn't Exist by Andy Bannister

Firstly, I should point out that this is not an apologetics book for Christianity.  Though the author is a Christian, you will not read the book and magically become a Christian, you will probably not change any of your beliefs, and you will not find a discussion about any of the 'difficult' bits of Christianity.
This is a book that looks to break down bad arguments, focusing on those from "New Atheists".

The blurb on Amazon reads:

In the last decade, atheism has leapt from obscurity to the front pages: producing best-selling books, making movies, and plastering adverts on the side of buses. There’s an energy and a confidence to contemporary atheism: many people now assume that a godless scepticism is the default position, indeed the only position for anybody wishing to appear educated, contemporary, and urbane. Atheism is hip, religion is boring. Yet when one pokes at popular atheism, many of the arguments used to prop it up quickly unravel. The Atheist Who Didn’t Exist is designed to expose some of the loose threads on the cardigan of atheism, tug a little, and see what happens. Blending humour with serious thought, Andy Bannister helps the reader question everything, assume nothing and, above all, recognise lazy scepticism and bad arguments. Be an atheist by all means: but do be a thought-through one.

There is a lot of humour throughout the book, and I confess to literally laughing out loud at some of the footnotes; however if you are not a fan of Monty Python,  Hitchhikers, Red Dwarf or any of that ilk, this probably isn't the book for you.

I really enjoyed this book and would recommend it to theists and atheists alike, at a minimum so that if you do try to argue about points of faith you don't fall back on easy soundbites.  It is an easy read, without too much heavy philosophy, and should be accessible for all.

Christmas is coming...

...and the goose [aka me] is getting fat!

Actually, I'm determined to be controlled over Christmas.  I will still enjoy my eat and drink, and I expect I will put a couple of pounds on, but by following water first and veggies most I will still be in control.  Being prepared is the key.

As we come to the end of November, I've had my mini panic that I have forgotten to buy somebody something for Christmas, so that has now been sorted.  I have arranged my Christmas delivery, and now just have to plan what we're eating so that everybody has a happy Christmas, but there isn't too much food that I'm tempted to gorge it all.

I'm also trying to write my Round Robin to include with a few Christmas cards.  I don't send it to everybody, as most people I speak to more often or we chat over Facebook.  I know when I receive them, there are only a few that I actually read as most of it I already know.  So, I started writing it the last couple of years, and it gets sent to older relatives who don't use computers.  I started writing it this morning, and I have covered more than an A4 page just about the girls' performing arts.  I haven't yet included anything about my husband and I, but I'm not sure there is anything to say.  My husband is still working full time, and I'm still home educating the girls and tutoring.  The End.

And there is still the tidying and sorting that I try to do before we decorate for Christmas (which we like to do the first weekend in December) and so there is room for more stuff in the house.  I have tried to tell people not to get us stuff, that we would rather experiences instead, but from previous experience I know that'll fall on deaf ears.  I need to wrap the presents we do have, post the presents and cards (with the round robin) that need to be posted, and I'm sure there's more that I have forgotten about.

Before we had children, I was one of those annoying people who had their Christmas sorted by the start of September.  Now, I'm running around after the children, barely have my own house in order, wanting to make good memories with my family and hoping I don't fail!  The girls have yet another dance show in a fortnight's time - a choreography competition - and I'm still yet to cut their music down to size.  The deadline for that is the end of this week!  So I better end here and get back to work.

Musings about Autistic Women

While the girls were at their Home Ed science class this morning, us mums were waiting and chatting, as usual. 

A couple of us were discussing being autistic adults, and autistic women, and how challenging it can be, especially to get a diagnosis.  As I think I've mentioned before, I'm self-diagnosed, and I'm happy with that identity and don't feel like I need to pursue a medical diagnosis for myself.  Another mum was saying that she is in the process of being diagnosed - her GP has referred her - and thinks having that officially acknowledged will be of benefit to her.  Another mum joined the discussion and said she has had the same experience, and has only recently come to feel comfortable in herself.  She has learned, particularly through drama, how to act normal, but were she in her home environment she would be a bit more flamboyant and excitable.  Out of the group of seven mums this morning, four of us definitely consider ourselves somewhere on the autistic spectrum, with another having never thought about it before, but was relating to what we were saying.

Then the discussion moved on to whether autism was statistically higher in the HE community?  Anecdotally, we all agreed it was.  Perhaps it is because our children may have suffered at school, or perhaps we knew they weren't going to fit before even sending them, and from exploring our children we notice the autism in ourselves? Or maybe, because we have fought our whole lives to be ourselves, it isn't that much more of a push to free our thinking beyond a schooled education to something that suits the individual?

Heart Song by Desiree Williams

Having recently finished a fantasy series that consumed me for a bit, I wanted to read something a bit lighter, so I decided upon a romance.  As I buy many books that are free, I have a huge variety of genres of fiction on my kindle, and many of the romances are historical fiction from America: Texan Brides, Women of the Prairie and series like that. [I should input here, that I have no idea if those are genuine titles, but they are the type of thing I mean.]  I was expecting Heart Song to be of that ilk.

The other thing about choosing books from my kindle, is that I don't see the book cover when I choose, nor do I read the blurb.  I literally choose books based on the title and whether they sound like the type of thing I fancy.  And that'll be why this book wasn't anything like I imagined!

The blurb on Amazon states:

In Aldonnia, the evil of Varkadon overflows its borders. War ravages the lands…

For as long as eighteen year-old Alanna can remember she’s lived in hiding, sealed off from the outside world. Despite a future built around a steadfast rule of seclusion, Alanna dreams of the impossible. Of a life outside of her parents’ cabin. A life with more for company than just birds and woodland creatures. A life she knows deep down is impossible for someone with gifts like hers.

That all changes the day Alanna finds a man floating face down in a stream. Despite her parents’ warnings, Alanna pulls the injured man out of the water and heals him with her elemental talents. Just another good deed. Until the man wakes and Alanna realizes so much more has happened than simply a life saved. The healing she performed on the stranger bound her soul to Jerric, the prince of Aldonnia. 

Alanna’s heart wants to keep the prince, but duty and destiny intervene. Alanna’s world is rocked as her parents are lost. Left in the care of family she didn’t know, Alanna learns more than she wanted to about the evil threatening the lands. There is much more behind her parents’ drive to protect. Alanna learns her gifts were bestowed in order to fulfill a greater purpose. A greater calling. One her enemies seek to destroy at all cost. 

Alanna’s choice is clear. To either ignore her destiny and remain hidden, or boldly fight to keep what sings to her heart.

So, yes, this book is a romance, but it is also a fantasy book too.  There are different groups of people: some, such as Alanna, can manipulate air or water, earth or fire; some are shape-shifters and can transform into an animal according to their clan; and others have different skills too.

The ongoing war is the back-drop to the plot; there are battles, injuries and death, but the author doesn't delve into the gruesomeness and horror of war, so would be suitable for younger readers too.

Given that I only read one fiction book at a time (unlike non-fiction when I always have multiple books on the go), it was addictive enough that I read all three books in the trilogy in four days.  An enjoyable read and I think you'd get enjoyment if you picked it up solely for either the romance or the fantasy.